It might sound crazy !!

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It might sound crazy

I know this sounds really crazy but I lay there night after night watching all these films and I think to myself the struggle and lives that people lead
I watched a film called
prayers for bobby
and it really puts things into perspective for life in general I never really had anyone to talk to properly about being gay
There are millions of people out there all in the same boat and having someone to talk to and listen to you can really make a difference
I never really talk to people about my life is it because I’m scared to maybe but there are so many ways out there for people too and I fel like I need to do something bout it
I journal my life and write every feeling and emotion I feel down for people to look back on in the years to come
I don’t try and maybe that is my weakness
Why is it so wrong ??
It’s not I think but
I don’t take the time out to do anything about it
I just can’t seem to get a focus on anything and why cause I never had anything to focus on
being wrapped up on others things life
work
and friends
I have missed the biggest part of my life
I am approaching 30 this year and have nothing to look back on and think that I made any real contribution to the world in any way shape or form and there are people out there fighting everyday
Whether it being
human rights
The right to marry
The right to be with the one you love
But in an unforgiving world it is an up hill struggle ?

Staying in most nights is probably not good for you or socialising with people gay people like myself has kept me sheltered
is it the scaredness of a person enough to make things better ?

I Suppose blogging everyday is a good way but if no one reads or hears about it then what is a person to do ?
pack up and move away run and hide from problems or doing something about it
as I write this I have all the best intentions of trying to do better for myself but I know that within a couple of days or weeks it will be a forgotten piece of writing drifting about in the ether somewhere

Where is the logic in that ??

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